NOTHING
IS FOREVER 6
by
flaming
muse
It
had been an unquestionably bad idea for Spike to go to Xander's apartment. Spike
had been fairly certain of that fact when he had offered to help Xander's
secretary with her problem, but the restaurant was slow in the middle of a rainy
weekday afternoon, and the idea of wandering the streets of Boston in the
daytime had been too appealing to ignore. Besides, despite his better judgment,
he was curious.
So he had gone, and he had been sure that he would be
able to get in and out in a matter of minutes. The papers would be signed, his
mild curiosity about Xander's life would be assuaged, and he could go back to
his job and his professional persona. It would be just a quick decent into
madness.
It had been anything but; the madness was still upon him a week
later, and he couldn’t quite seem to put his experience behind
him.
Amazingly enough, he and Xander had had an almost pleasant
conversation, and Spike had actually enjoyed the banter without the hidden barbs
that had been so prevalent in the past. He had relaxed enough that he had nearly
been comfortable… at least before he had heard Willow's voice on Xander's phone.
It had been far too easy to let his guard down in the anonymous apartment well
away from California, but hearing Willow had reminded him sharply of everything
that Xander was still tied to, everything that Spike had firmly put behind
him.
In a way, Spike was glad of the reminder, because it was a warning
for him to be more on his guard before he had gone too far. As easy as Xander
might be to talk to, there was no way that Spike could spend any time with him
and not get involved with the Scoobies again. Having a casual beer was too much
contact; they couldn't be more than business associates. He had to
remember.
The problem was that he was remembering too much. He couldn't
forget how nice it felt just to spend some time with a friend, drinking beer and
taking cracks at the delivery guys. He couldn't forget how readily Xander had
treated him as an equal. He couldn't forget how toned and tempting that slice of
Xander's stomach had looked while he had wiped his face with his form-fitting
shirt. And if Xander was actually attracted to men, then that enticing piece of
golden skin wasn't necessarily off limits.
Except of course it was,
because it was a part of Xander's body, which housed Xander's mind, which was
attached to Xander's friends. The body was definitely appealing, the mind was at
times amusing, but the friends were an absolute deal-breaker.
The shock
of finding himself even somewhat at ease with someone was hard for Spike to
overcome; he couldn’t recall when he was last that comfortable. He hadn’t felt
threatened, he hadn’t felt pressured, he hadn’t felt out of control, and he also
for once hadn’t felt lonely. It had been years since he hadn’t been lonely,
probably since before Dru had gotten so sick. It was that feeling of
companionship without obligation - as casual as it had been - that he was having
trouble shaking off.
The thought of having a friend, as unlikely as
friendship would be with a Scooby, was too tempting to be safe, and Spike
ruthlessly sank himself into his job. There was always something to do at the
restaurant, and he was usually able to find some demons causing trouble after
Cold Comfort closed each night. Boston's demon community was old and generally
quite peaceful, but he gleefully dusted vamps by moonlight in Harvard Yard and
threw the corpses of the demons he killed on Boston Common into the Public
Garden Lagoon. As he was trying to be a constructive member of the community, he
made certain that he dumped the corpses well away from the Swan
Boats.
Spike also kept up his campaign of avoidance; he even ordered his
employees to alert him if Xander came in. On Friday night, when Anne called back
to let him know that Xander and Cassie had arrived to have dinner, Spike closed
himself in his office to avoid temptation. He had suffered years of torment with
Angelus and Darla and had never given in, but he knew that his willpower wasn't
great enough to stand up to kindness. It was best to stay away
entirely.
Not hiding. Just keeping myself out of danger. Spike
snorted at the thought. Don't remember the last time that danger came in the
form of anything as weak as a twenty-something man with one eye, no magic, and
only marginal fighting skills. He leaned back in his chair and smoothed his
hands through his hair. This is a whole new sort of battle, mate. Trying to
keep my sanity intact, not my skin.
Some hours after Xander had come
in, Spike ventured out to the bar. He looked around and saw Xander's assistant
sitting alone at her cleared table. She was pulling out her credit card and
slipping it in the leather folder that held the check. Xander was nowhere to be
seen.
"Has he gone?" Spike asked Anne.
"He got his coat and headed
outside five minutes ago," she replied. "I was about to come back and tell
you."
"Ta." He took a deep breath and released some of his tension as he
exhaled.
"You know, boss, when you asked me to keep an eye out for him I
expected it was because you wanted to see him, not to avoid him." Spike gave her
a quelling look, but the reason that Anne was such a good assistant manager was
that she was never daunted by anything or anyone, including him. She grinned and
continued. "Chris said that you two knew each other. You seemed kind of
friendly. Now you're hiding in your office whenever he's around. What
gives?"
When Spike gave her his best glower, she just
laughed.
"Chris thinks you owe the guy money. He says that he must've
lost the eye in a fight and that he's really tough behind the nice-guy act.
I think that he's an old friend who reminds you of times that you want to
forget... which would be like all of them, since you never talk about
your past."
"And I think that you lot need to work more and talk less,"
Spike said.
"And I think that we're underpaid as it is and should walk
out until we get a raise and some answers."
"You get paid better than at
any other restaurant of this size in town."
"Doesn't mean I don't want a
new car." Anne grinned.
"Is that the bill for forty-six?" Spike asked as
Becca, the server for that section, swiped a credit card through the
machine.
"Yep."
"I'll take it back to her," Spike said and reached
over the counter for the folder and the slip.
"Thanks," Becca said.
"Fifty-two's being a nightmare."
"Want me to stop by?" Anne
asked.
"Nah. Jason's on it. They just want extra everything, including
all of my time." Becca rolled her eyes and stepped out from behind the
bar.
As Spike began to turn away, Anne laid a hand on his arm.
"So
who was right? Me or Chris?" she asked.
"Both of you," Spike replied with
a cocky smirk designed to disguise that he was actually telling a bit of the
truth.
Cassie smiled as soon as she saw him walking toward her; they had
met two or three times so far to plan the Hallowe'en event and had developed an
instant camaraderie. Spike was a bit surprised that Xander had selected her,
since she was at least in her forties, married, moderately plump, and comely but
probably never pretty. She was definitely intelligent and efficient, but most
young men would have chosen looks over aptitude; perhaps Xander really had lost
his taste for women. Or maybe his remaining eye wasn't that good.
"The
boss stuck you with the bill, eh?" Spike asked, placing the folder in front of
her and sliding into the chair to her right.
"It was a business meeting,
so it was a business expense," she said, signing the slip and tucking her copy
and her card into her wallet. "I just got a corporate card, so he let me use it.
Of course, he didn't tell me 'til afterwards that the company was paying, so I
didn't order the lobster."
They both grinned.
"Next time," Spike
said. "And don't forget dessert, too."
"And maybe an appetizer. I'd love
to try the crab cakes."
"Next time you're here I'll send some over. On
the house, unless the company's paying."
Cassie blushed and
smiled.
"Thank you. You're too kind."
"What's the point of having
a restaurant if I can't use my power to flirt with the ladies?" Spike
asked.
"I can see why Cold Comfort is so popular, then. You must have
women throwing themselves at you."
"If I do, I haven't caught any yet.
Maybe I'm waiting for the right person." He gave her his most enticing smile,
which got him a wide grin in return.
"Or maybe you need to pay more
attention to your game. You always seem to be busy. Do you even have time for a
relationship?"
Spike raised an eyebrow.
"You'd ask me that
question when you've been out to dinner with your boss instead of spending
Friday night with your husband? Or maybe there's something going on with you
two..."
Cassie laughed.
"I won't even dignify that suggestion with
a response," she said. "But, as you have reminded me, I should get
home."
"Would you like us to call you a cab? It's getting
late."
"No, thank you. I only live a couple of blocks away, and Xander
has offered to walk me home. He's out making a quick call before we
go."
Ice formed in the pit of Spike's stomach. Xander was still
there.
With his mouth frozen in what he hoped was a friendly smile, Spike
rose to his feet.
"I'll just let you -"
"Hey, Cassie, is this guy
bothering you?" Xander said jovially from behind Spike's shoulder.
"He
was just offering to get me a cab. Would that be easier for you?" Cassie
asked.
"Nope. You're on my way home."
"Great. Let me just powder
my nose, as it were, and I'll be ready to go." Cassie smiled at them both and
walked toward the rear of the restaurant.
"How's it going?" Xander asked
as Spike turned to face him.
Spike shrugged. "Business is doing
well."
"I meant with you," Xander said more seriously. His dark hair was
rumpled and the sleeves of his blue dress shirt were rolled up his forearms,
making him look every inch like the young businessman he was. If he also looked
damned gorgeous, Spike made sure not to notice.
"I'm fine."
"You
didn't seem fine when you ran out of my apartment the other
week."
"Bollocks! I didn't run, I..." Spike collected himself and
continued more calmly. "I had what I had come for; I simply left you to your
phone call. It's called being polite. You might try it."
"You knew it was
Willow on the phone."
"So? Did you think to put me on and scare her half
to death?"
"I'm sure she'd be thrilled to hear from you," said
Xander.
The thought sent chills down Spike's spine.
"You gave me
your word. If you're going to go back on it, you'd best tell me now," Spike said
with a hint of a growl.
Xander paled slightly and shook his
head.
"No, no. But if you ever want I could -"
"No."
"But
-"
"So you're going to walk Cassie home?" Spike asked
blandly.
"Yeah. She lives about five blocks from me, and I didn't want
her wandering around the city at night."
"But you reckon you're
safe?"
"I haven't seen a single vampire besides you the entire time I've
been in Boston," Xander said.
"Just 'cause you don't see them doesn't
mean they're not there. Boston's an old city; there are plenty of demons here. A
few of 'em probably came over on the Mayflower."
"Yeah, I've actually
been meaning to ask you about -"
"Are you even carrying a stake?" Spike
asked.
Xander shook his head, and Spike rolled his eyes.
"Did the
preacher remove some of your brains when he got your eye?"
"This isn't
Sunnydale, Spike."
"That doesn't mean there aren't beasties out
there."
"You'd know," Xander said.
"Yes, I would. You're going to
walk Cassie home and then go wandering around the streets in the middle of the
night? If a demon doesn't get you, a mugger might. Are you completely
daft?"
"Come on, Spike. We're in a safe part of town, and I'm not exactly
a small guy."
"No, but you're well dressed, have an obvious handicap, and
are wearing a cell phone on your belt that's probably worth more than a week's
pay even in this part of the city."
Xander looked
unconvinced.
"Only if you average in the incomes of all of the starving
college students. Not that I don't appreciate the concern, but
-"
"Concern, my ass. It's common sense. We'll call you both a cab," Spike
said.
"I'm not taking a cab."
"You know I can force you into
it."
"With the cab driver, Cassie, and the entire restaurant watching?"
Xander crossed his arms over his chest and grinned.
"Fine. Then I'll walk
you both home."
The smug grin disappeared.
"That's stupid. You
don't have to -"
"If you won't take a taxi, I'll walk with you, and you
can't bloody well stop me."
That seemed to be that. Xander wasn't happy
about the situation, but he stopped arguing when Cassie returned.
"It's a
nice night, and I could use a break," Spike said after he explained that he was
joining them.
"I'm sure I could find something to break," Xander muttered
under his breath. Spike ignored him.
As they walked Spike and Cassie
carried on an innocuous conversation about the latest exhibit at the Museum of
Fine Arts while Xander sulked behind them, and then both men were silent as they
walked from her apartment to Xander's. The streets were largely empty as they
got further away from Harvard Square, and Spike kept alert to the noises in the
shadows. There were a couple of suspicious smells and sounds, but no one
bothered the two of them as they stalked through the streets.
"Do you
need to walk me to my door or do you trust me to get up the stairs by myself?"
Xander asked sourly when they reached the steps of the brick building that
housed his apartment.
"I expect that even you can manage the..." Spike
trailed off as he noticed that the front door was ajar. "Isn't that supposed to
be locked?"
"One of my neighbors probably forgot to close it. It happens
all the time."
"I'm going up with you."
"It was just one of my
neighbors…"
"Then it'll only take two minutes. The more you complain the
longer I'll be here."
Xander glared at Spike for a long moment and then
led the way inside.
Get him inside safely and then leave, Spike
reminded himself as he followed Xander through the door.
PART
7
