Parts 38 - 49
Pleased with having Spike home, Xander fends
off concerns that he hasn't taken care of himself. When he learns about a dangerous procedure to
remove the chip, Xander contests whether Spike should undergo it. Talk of long-term relationships leads to talk
of turning, and Spike explains that he wants Xander to retain his soul. Later they discuss Christmas plans, and as they
go on to talking about sex, Xander explains that he can wait for Spike to take him
because he knows the fantasy will become reality someday. At home once again, they trade the fantasies they
had of first-times with one another years ago.
Xander stays home late to spend time with Spike,
earning a hickey that brings him jibes at work.
That evening, he finds Spike finishing a sketch of Beth as a gift to Patrick. Beth teases them about the mark on Xander's neck,
and Spike broadcasting his claim. When Xander
wonders if Spike will be able to handle a party, Spike demands to be left alone
and slams the door to the living room. In
the middle of the night, Spike phones Xander in the midst of a panic attack, stuck
and frightened in the downstairs room. Though
his predatory stance frightens Xander, Xander confesses to having erotic fantasies
about Spike's demon. Leaving Spike with the
hex on him so that he'll sleep, Xander destroys a drawing, a reminder of Spike's
victimization at the hands of the Initiative.
Xander attends the company party and is shocked
by negative reactions to his sexual orientation. Next morning, Xander finds Spike sketching an
erotic picture of him, and affirms that he doesn't endorse the dangerous chip procedure. Later, Xander tries to see what Spike sees in
him, and then wanders into Patrick's office with Jake and Rafe to reluctantly hear
talk of New Year's restructuring. Jake tells
Xander he's ended things with Josie and Patrick announces that he's making all three
of them full partners. Spike at the mall
with Beth calls Xander to ask if Xander hasn't forgiven him anything. Xander assures him, and a sudden burst of energy
coming from Beth reinvigorates Spike. He
greets Xander, pleased about the delivery of a surprise Christmas present, and the
two week holiday from work begins.
Christmas morning brings presents: an artist's studio complete with artificial sunlight
for Spike and a baby grand piano in a newly-decorated music room for Xander. Spike teaches Xander scales based on William's
musical knowledge, then initiates enthusiastic sex. Afterwards, Spike suddenly asks where Jake is
for the holiday, they phone and insist that he join them, eventually extending the
invitation to all of their close friends.
While exchanging clothes, Xander is overcome with the need to take Spike
on the couch, a vigorous session of fucking that turns into top-n-tails oral sex,
all fueled by lust and by resilience brought on by vampire blood. An ID bracelet with their names on it completes
Spike's presents to Xander, and Xander gives Spike literary volumes purchased with
William in mind. Jake arrives, and after
he and Xander trek off to his house to bring his tree back for the night's celebration,
Spike opens his present from Jake to find the pen given to William by his parents
on his eighteenth birthday.
Jake tells Spike he found the pen randomly. Spike becomes unsettled when Beth's hand passing
over his head activates his chip. Patrick
reads a ghost story, and Spike drifts to sleep then wakes in fright, fleeing to
the corner of the room. As Xander urges him
that he's safe, Patrick continues reading as Spike calms. When Spike leaves the room, the others express
their heartfelt sympathies. Xander's refusal to abandon his guests and have sex
angers Spike, and the compromise blow job that Xander concedes to elicits Moira's
laughter at his mussed appearance when he returns. She comforts him, and he spends a few more hours
with them while Spike sleeps. Tempted while
Spike is under the hex to make Spike penetrate him at last, Xander rejects that
deceitful plan, instead bringing him out of the hex in the middle of sex. Though Xander asks him to explain earlier reactions,
Spike guardedly keeps his answer vague.
Spike and Xander attend Beth and Patrick's holiday
party. Patrick's Scottish garb turns Spike's
thoughts to how Xander would look in a kilt.
The family members take care of Spike as Xander speaks to a potential client,
architect Christien Haakon. Curiosity leads
Spike into the attic, and he is shocked before suddenly coming to himself, back
in the living room on the first floor, with no memory of what he saw. Watching Xander take part in a dance, Spike's
jealousy rises briefly in response to Jake.
Driving home, Spike dryly notes that Xander is as high as a kite, and his
probing questions about Xander's conversation partner lead them to pulling over
to the side of the road to have sex. Back
at home, while Spike sleeps under the hex Xander sits at the piano and considers
being turned.
While Xander cleans his car in preparation for
their New Year's trip to Sunnydale, Spike entices him by lounging exposed on the
hood of the Jaguar, stroking himself to full hardness. They scramble into the back of the Mercedes, rubbing
against each other as Xander tells him he wants them to mark one another so that
any demon (especially Angel, who will be at
Xander leaves the house early on New Year's Day
to get a surprise for Spike. Spike's tortured
thoughts conjure up Riley Finn, who spits degrading vitriol at him, and burns before
his eyes as they debate whether Xander could ever love someone as flawed as Spike. A phone call to Xander calms Spike, and Xander
comes home with the surprise: a kilt lent
to him by Patrick. Despite Xander's lingering
nervousness, Spike is thrilled about his lover's outfit, and rushes him upstairs
to the new studio for a photo session. Memories
of his recent delusion of Riley stop Spike from agreeing to fuck Xander, but an
intense love-making session on the couch follows. A light puncture of fangs at Xander's neck once
again raises talk of turning and forever.
The action recommences in March. His new status as a full partner has kept Xander working hard, and away from Spike. Ready for his two week vacation, Xander finds Spike preparing for a trip to LA. Xander attempts to seduce Spike into staying, but Spike insists on the trip. As Xander rails, Spike experiences sharp pangs of fear, feeling defenseless. He pleads with Xander to go to LA, but that raises more ire. Xander bitingly tells Spike that he'll never agree to be turned. Spike tries to reconcile them, but Xander tells Spike not to call and to fuck off. After a dose of sleeping potion Xander wakes two days later. He meets Jake and contemplates calling Spike at Jake's urging. Hazy about the details due to emotions, anger, and the sleep jag, Xander mostly remembers Spike leaving when he wanted him to stay, and doesn't phone LA even as Pat and Rafe arrive at the pub to spend time with him.
Xander searches Spike's studio, finding drawings
of paying clients, and a bank account attesting to the gains Spike had made. Spike's date book makes Xander realize how out
of touch he'd been with his partner. Xander
snoops in the computer files for original photos of Spike, but the system crashes
during his search. Hard work brings a trip
to
Xander begins to cut himself to try to attain
some measure of peace as he despairs over Spike's continued absence. Called to the site by continued notices that three
men have been seen trying to steal materials, Xander chats with the young demon
security guard, Sammy, who writes pulp demon fiction. Xander rushes off when he hears the alarm from
his beloved Mercedes. Stunned at the pickaxe
someone left in his car, feeling like this assault has toppled his already fragile
sense of self, Xander doesn't notice footsteps coming behind him. In LA, Spike receives the call from Patrick telling
him something terrible has happened, and Angel drives him back to see Xander at
the hospital. Flashes of memory haunt Spike
as he considers truly losing Xander. His
last words to Xander, "try not to get yourself killed," after their fight
sink any remaining composure Spike has as he's by Xander's bedside, holding his
hand while Xander slips into death.
Spike comes to himself in the car, realizing that they haven't yet arrived at the hospital. Filled with trepidation, he continues to imagine the direst outcomes despite Angel's assurances. As Spike slips in and out of awareness, he sees William, his doppelganger, and watches Xander turn to dust. At the hospital, Patrick holds Spike as Rafe and Jake debate the potential link between the attack on Xander and a homophobic website posting. Angel, introduced as Spike's cousin, asks questions, and Spike rushes past the doctor to enter Xander's room, finding his love nearly unrecognizable because of the assault. Angel quietly explains the dramatic damage. They debate giving Xander more of Spike's blood, strengthened by Spike feeding from Angel, but the reality of having to remove Xander's ventilator tube makes Spike hesitate. Angel raises the possibility of turning Xander, but Spike furiously rejects that. They decide to wait until Willow arrives before attempting to feed Xander blood. Angel leaves Spike in the room alone, brokenly singing Xander the words to their song, "This Guy's in Love with You".