Parts 50 - 62

Repossession 50

Willow arrives; with her approval, Spike publicly announces the plan to take Xander off the ventilator.  Angel urges everyone to say their goodbyes just in case.  Willow enters first, and Beth comforts her as they remember the Alex/Xander they know.  In the privacy of the Jaguar in the garage, Spike and Angel discuss feeding Xander blood.  Angel tries to comfort as he imagines Pat would, and offers his own blood to strengthen Spike for Xander.  Upon their return to the hospital room, Spike finds the scene of everyone gathered unnervingly similar to William's vision of Xander's death.  As the doctor oversees the removal of the ventilation equipment, Spike kisses Xander, slipping a small amount of blood into his mouth.  After terrifying moments of stillness, Xander at last breathes.  Later, alone with Xander, Spike nervously feeds him greater quantities of blood, wishing Xander could help him make the decision of how much will be enough.

Repossession 51

Spike and Willow squabble as they keep watch over Xander.  Before dragging both Spike and Willow home, Angel tells Pat that he remembers him, but moments later he forgets their conversation.  Spike discusses Xander's ‘miraculous' recovery with Willow, and alone for the first time in days, he cries on the bed that smells like Xander.  Stumbling across his unopened present for Xander prompts a frantic search of the computer; not one of the sixty emails from Spike had reached Xander.  Frantic, Spike offers himself to Angel if only his sire will hunt down the assailants.  A kind of tête-à-tête with William as Spike withdraws in fear ends when Angel realizes Spike would hate himself if they continued.  Angel returns after a conversation with Sammy to report that Xander's attackers had doused him in gasoline.  Learning about the homophobic web posts about Xander, Angel insists Willow track down the attackers through the internet instead of magic.  Jake arrives, uncertain and anguished.  They offer comfort, and Willow puts the hex on him as he sleeps.  Spike re-makes himself once more into his old self, using bleach, nail polish, and change in wardrobe before he sinks into the bed, succumbing to loneliness and depression. 

Repossession 52

A month later, Spike reads through the log he's been keeping for Xander.  Nighttimes at the hospital, Spike massages Xander, touching the healing wounds left from the attack and tracing the nearly invisible scars of the cuts Xander gave himself.  Free from the sympathetic but tiresome attentions of both Angel and Willow, Spike welcomes Jake's presence at the home, finds comfort in Giles' visit and obvious concern for Xander, and puts up with the stream of other visitors to Xander's bedside.  He finds solace in the way the family members spend time with Xander and occasionally wrest him away from the hospital for drinks and conversation.  Xander finally awakens at the hospital;  confused at seeing Spike by the side of the bed, he calls him up, and bleary, Spike doesn't remember when he wakes how he got there.  The sound of Xander's voice startles and elates him.  Xander doesn't remember what occurred, and only wants out of the hospital.  Patrick arrives to the shock of an awakened Xander, and the doctor tries to convince them in vain that Xander should not be moved home immediately.  After he's transported home, Xander tearfully wonders aloud how Spike can be there after Xander busted them apart.  Spike reassures him, despite his own need for comfort, and his later conversation with Moira affirms his resolve to be strong and ensure that Xander will heal.

Repossession 53

As Xander improves, Spike revels in the close contact feeding him blood brings.  Though he's aroused by the act, Spike is willing to wait patiently to reinitiate their sex life; however, Xander doesn't want to wait and convinces Spike to be the recipient of a blow job that allows Xander to lie still.  When Spike asks what prompted the rush, Xander confesses that he got kissed.  Spike quickly angers, but at Xander's plaintive plea stays with him.  He starts when he realizes that Xander is past due for his pain medication.  Xander acts compliantly as Spike tells him that there have to be rules, and even accepts Spike's admission that he threw himself at Angel in negotiation for his help.  Spike tells Xander Angel turned him down, but leaves out the part in the middle in which Angel had wanted to accept the offer.  Xander learns that Spike tried to maintain contact while in LA, and grows emotional over the letters and Spike's journal.  Angel visits with Xander, still bent on revenge, and Spike and Xander later discuss Angel's lonely position and his need to protect family.

Repossession 54

Angel expresses suspicions about the family to Spike.  When Spike needs to get out of the house for a while, Angel volunteers to sit with Xander. Angel provides some information about Detective Crawley and the investigation into Xander's assault.  After repeating that he doesn't remember what occurred, Xander answers Angel's curiosity about how he and Spike began living together in Sunnydale with an account of their early friendship and exactly when he realized Spike was the one for him.  Angel tells Xander about the extremely critical condition he was in at the hospital, then assures Xander he thinks Spike is lucky to have him.  After speaking about his plans to get Buffy to move to LA now that Dawn is more independent, Angel watches as Xander falls asleep, purring to comfort him.

Repossession 55

Spike, unimpressed with the cozy scene Angel makes with sleeping Xander, ushers his sire out the door with a cup of blood for the road.  Xander wants to change his medication so that he and Spike can have sex sooner;  when he pursues the issue of Spike fucking him, Spike's arousal dampens as thoughts of unworthiness flood his mind.  Xander alleviates the tension by fingering and blowing Spike.  A conversation about sexual experience, past partners, and the limitations Spike's trauma imposes on their physical interactions ensues.  Spike replies to Xander's queries about his day with the bare facts, leaving out his unsettling conversation with Max, his blood supplier, about a nest of vamps in the area, omitting his panic at being around so many humans when he picked up Xander's prescriptions, and failing to mention his drive over to the copse to cry and rage alone in the car.

Repossession 56

Spike listens to Xander's laughter (somewhat curtailed by the discomfort Xander experiences) while he makes preparations to show Xander the portrait he'd made for his birthday still hidden in the attic.  Xander wakens to a room sentimentally lit with candles and is shocked to realize that it's his and Spike's anniversary.  Emotions overwhelm them both as Xander again apologizes for the way he behaved when Spike left for LA, Spike shudders at the thought of almost having lost Xander, and Xander imagines what it will be like a year hence when, trauma and chip dealt with, Spike will be able to be inside of him.  Xander is suitably stunned by Spike's portrait of himself.  They scroll through digital pictures of them on the laptop together, and Xander gives the barest of facts about cutting himself when those few pictures turn up at the end of the session. 

Repossession 57

Willow, Dawn, and Buffy arrive for a visit; their presence prompts consideration of where all of them will continue to make their homes in the future.  Spike employs Willow to cast a ward over the house to ensure their safety.  However, when she begins to prepare the ward, they are surprised to realize that the house and grounds are already under the protection of a powerful ward.  The girls convince Spike and Xander that Xander should try to exercise in the pool;  the strain of physical activity and the brief separation from Spike make Xander realize that he's far from recovered.  The reality that Xander hadn't felt safe with Buffy taking him out of the pool hits her hard;  the building tension over her dissatisfaction with the changes she sees in Xander escalates into an exchange of barbs with Spike.  Their encounter clears the air even as Spike reflects that only Buffy and Angel have had problems accepting Xander's new family.

Repossession 58

The affectionate coddling Xander gets from Moira prompts Spike to ask her why she has no children of her own.  When she says that she cannot, Spike realizes that both she and Beth have somehow compensated for that by taking in Xander, Jake, and even him.  Patrick's serious account of the events related to the assault inadvertently prompts Dawn to blurt out that Willow had contacted Xander's parents when he was in a coma.  Spike comforts Xander in the privacy of their bedroom, assuring Xander that his parents' apathy means nothing, and sharing the memories of his early awareness of how much he cared for Xander back in Sunnydale.  Outside the door, Patrick overhears Xander's plaintive words as he wonders what he did to make his parents not love him.  Laying his hand on Xander's head once they are alone, Patrick imparts rest, peace, and the ability for Xander to once again be intimate with Spike.  He takes everyone else out for dinner to give the two lovers an undisturbed evening just as a thunderstorm begins brewing outside. 

Repossession 59

Both Xander and Spike are relieved and turned-on when Xander is suddenly able to get an erection again even with the medications he's continuing to take.  Spike reflects that this is Patrick's doing somehow, but as he finishes giving Xander a blow-job and Xander renews his claimant's mark while taking more blood from Spike, all thoughts become focused on their lovemaking.  Spike coaxes Xander to beg him to stay as though it was the first moment that he woke as Spike in Xander's old apartment.  Xander complies but when his emotional delicacy turns the role-playing into a tearful reaction, Spike hastily reassures him.  The excitement of having sex again nearly overwhelms them, but even though their first session ends quickly, more exchange of blood has Xander eager to continue.  The girls come home, and alone downstairs, Buffy stumbles upon Spike's sketch book.  Discovering pictures of Spike's torture and shocked by the depiction of Riley among the tormentors, Buffy seeks out Spike and Xander in their room, asking for their forgiveness without telling them why.

Repossession 60

Dawn makes teasing remarks about the vigor of Spike and Xander's sex life, but when she runs upstairs to tell them breakfast is ready she's silenced by the obvious love between them and the protective gestures Xander makes towards Spike even though he's the one who is wounded.  The pain from the injuries has kicked in again, though Xander's body still reacts to Spike's caresses.  Just as things are heating up, Detective Crawley arrives downstairs, but not with news of Xander's assailants.  The detective breaks the news that Xander's childhood home in Sunnydale burned to the ground after a lightning bolt hit it, killing his parents.  Stunned, Xander hotly demands if Willow or Spike somehow did this; at their incredulous denials, he contends that he himself must be responsible, and that all of them including Spike must leave to avoid the disasters he can cause.  Hysteria washes over Spike as he almost falls apart, thinking Xander might really ask him to leave; Xander passes out from pain and anxiety, and Spike orders the girls to pack and travel home to make the funeral arrangements for the Harrises.  After giving Xander an injection of potent pain medication, Spike leaves him sleeping, recruiting Jake when he stops by for the job of driving the girls to the airport.  A private conversation with Willow makes her agree to check for Spike if there's anything to Xander's theory that he can jinx himself and others.  After the general departure, Spike hears Xander waking; Spike curses when he sees Xander out of reach, still weak and wandering through the garden in daylight where Spike can't reach him.

Repossession 61

Xander returns inside, numb with shock and looking for comfort from an upset and shaky Spike.  Spike reminds Xander that he has to think of him whether or not it's convenient, and that he can't lump Spike in with everyone else when he pushes people away.  Xander clings to the idea he may be responsible for his parents' deaths.  Spike tries to care for Xander even through his anger, but when the drugs kick in Xander insists on struggling upstairs himself.  Xander tries to promise that he won't ignore Spike in favor of work again, and inquires more about Spike's engagements sketching women.  In the midst of discussing Willow, Spike playfully asks Xander if he'd ever find Oz interesting, and Xander rapidly becomes alarmed, asking Spike about the women that he sketched and the degree to which he thinks about sleeping with other people.  Spike admits that some of the women made passes at him, but insists that any returning interest on his part was merely superficial because he has everything that he wants.  Xander speaks to Pat on the phone, who confirms that he's not well enough to travel to Sunnydale for the funeral, but Spike distracts him with seductive gestures, and they take advantage of the fact that the medicine hasn't yet inhibited Xander's arousal.

Repossession 62

The family gives Xander and Spike some space in the week after the funeral as the storms continue and Xander thinks of the irony that he was almost burned after his attack but his father died by fire.  Rapid emotional shifts have Xander suffering nightmares, then later cause Spike to experience more PTSD, panicking throughout the house as Xander helplessly tries to pursue him in his recovering state.  Their weaknesses stand in stark relief as the frantic Spike seeks much-needed comfort from the more emotionally stable Xander, then has to collect himself in order to carry Xander back to their room.  A drive to the copse to amuse Xander turns into a confrontation with three local vampires.  After they disparage Spike for allowing his Consort to go unclaimed and speak so independently, Spike kills two of them and spares the third to act as his envoy to proclaim that there's a new Master in town.  Talk of the vampire nest leads Xander to wonder if he should call Spike Master, and the discussion of mastery inevitably leads to a discussion of William.  Xander confesses that he misses William, but insists that he wants Spike wholly to the fore.

PARTS 63 - 74